⁴He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity. ⁵(but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?). 1 Timothy 3:4-5

There is no perfect church. There is no perfect family. There is no perfect dad.

Recognizing these facts, a man who would lead an assembly of Christians must first have shown success in orchestrating and managing the affairs of his own household, so that, warts and all, an outsider sees a beautiful thing, a work of art.

A would-be leader has kept his wife and children in subjection, not to himself, but to God, and has cared for them as God cares for him. He has also managed his financial affairs as one would expect of a leader in the church.

The man of God rules his home with all seriousness and dignity. This runs contrary to the message communicated in the media today, where dad is a klutz at best.

One thing popped out to me as I studied the words in this passage. The Greek word for “household” means “house” or “dwelling.” This may hold the key to answering the perplexing question about who’s responsible for a wayward child.

Despite dispensing love and care in one’s family, it’s still possible for a child to stray (out from under your roof).  

A leader with a wayward child should not be held accountable for a kid with a mind and will of his or her own. But it’s still hard to swallow.

There’s even more said about children of leaders in Titus 1:6, that they be “believers.”

“…having children who believe, not accused of dissipation or rebellion…”

When choosing a leader in the church, the status of his home is a good barometer of how he will handle the affairs of the church, even how he will deal with the wayward ones associated with the assembly.